Hi there…it’s been a while, I know.  Almost a year to be exact.  As the leader of HFL, I’d like to take this opportunity to explain why.

In December 2015, I felt like I needed some inspiration.  It’d been over a year since our Summer 2014 team trip to Hungary and Romania, where we spent a week with a group of incredibly gifted and hard-working students at Snétberger Music Talent Center near Lake Balaton, and then helped to develop a property in Romania that housed an after-school program for underprivileged youth just up the road from a crumbling Roma village.  The HFL team was planning to gather our supporters at an event in Seattle in March 2016, so I decided to join Lily, our HFL Vice President who lives in Hungary full-time, and visit some of our HFL partners.

It was a fun and productive trip — we had plenty of news to share with the folks back home.  But on the day of our March event, I came down with strep throat, and so I begrudgingly chose to cancel the party my friends and family and I worked so hard to put on.  One by one, things kept happening that made me and my team feel like things were off, so we decided to postpone our May 2016 fundraiser and trip that summer.  For a classic Type A personality like me, who was basing some part of my self-worth on HFL’s growth and impact, that was extremely hard for me to do.  And it was then that I began to realize that success at work, HFL, etc. brought affirmation, a feeling of being appreciated and necessary.  Without it, I was actually quite insecure on the inside.  If I didn’t believe God loved me simply for who I am as I am at this very moment rather than me + my accomplishments, then I couldn’t possibly love myself, which is why I continually pushed myself beyond my limits and into burn out.  I believed the lie of our culture that if I were really committed, I’d keep pushing.  I made no time for self-care, nourishment.  I didn’t even know how to take care of myself or what that looked like for me.  Somehow, my needs got squeezed out by none other than me.

How could I lead an org named “Hungary for Love” when I had so much to learn about God’s love towards me and loving myself, without which I couldn’t possibly love others fully…including those we aimed to serve?

So I put aside the things that made me feel good and was left with me without all the stuff.  I needed to understand that I was loved not because I’m a businesswoman, a non-profit leader, or a church volunteer, but that I’m loved for who I am…and that will always be enough.  And while Lily continued to acclimate to the Hungarian people, language, and culture, I worked on me.  I feared that it would take a really long time to undo the limiting beliefs I clung to all these years, but it didn’t.  God is so faithful and gracious like that.  2016’s journey was painful and hard, but seasons of growth always are.  And over the last few months, it’s become apparent that it’s time to refocus on HFL.

So here we are.  We’re thinking our next service trip to Hungary and Romania will be in early August 2017 for 2-3 weeks.  We’re working with our partners in-country to figure out where we’ll go and what work we’ll do.  No matter how it takes shape though, we’re sure it’ll be hard, fun, and life-changing as always.  Stay tuned for more updates coming soon…

“Always be humble and gentle.  Be patient with each other,
making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” (Ephesians 4:2)

With much love,
Susan